Miss Utah on Gender and Unequal Pay: Create Education Better

Written
by Stephanie Laufer, Esq. of KEITHLEY LAW, PLLC

Miss Utah Hits the News

If you’ve been watching the public debacle regarding the most recent Miss USA pageantry, you’ve seen a lot of Miss Utah in the news. Despite the fact that Miss USA contestant Marissa Powell (Utah) didn’t win the coveted Miss USA crown, she created a media frenzy over her fumbled answer during the Q&A
portion of the competition. 

During the competition, Miss Utah
was asked: “A recent report shows that in 40 percent of American families
with children, women are the primary earners yet they continue to earn less
than men. What does this say about society?” Miss Utah’s precious response? After
spilling out an incoherent thought about America needing to “create education
better,” the beauty flashed a defeated smile, aware of the cringe-worthy
response that was being aired live, nationwide, and about to explode over
social media.

Miss Utah Gives Another Answer

The Today Show gave Powell a second chance the following Tuesday morning, allowing her to
redo her answer without the nerves of the competition clouding her
thoughts. She said: “It needs to be
equal pay for equal work. It’s hard enough already to earn a living, and it
shouldn’t be harder just because you’re a woman.”

Let’s Talk About Equal Pay 

Powell is right about equal pay, and there is general consensus among scholars that the majority of the
disparity between men and women’s pay can be attributed to differences in the choices men and women make regarding their careers. There is disagreement over what amount of the unexplained gap is due
to explicit discrimination against women, and how much of it can be
attributed to remaining differences between men and women’s choices, and
whether the choices that women and men make regarding their careers are
themselves a product of discrimination or social pressures. 

Virginia’s Mission to End Workplace Discrimination: Virginia Employment Law

The nationwide battle to close the wage gap and end workplace discrimination based
on gender, age, ethnicity, sexual orientation, etc., has a long way to go. Virginia has adopted its owns statutes to both make discrimination a civil offense, and provide certain avenues for individuals to assert their
rights and seek remedies for discrimination or wrongful termination. Under the Virginia Code, men and women must earn equal pay for the same work, regardless of sex. If you are a woman earning less than your male coworker, you can lean on the Virginia Code to file a labor complaint.

If you’re looking for an experienced Virginia employment law attorney or Virginia wrongful termination lawyer, contact Keithley Law, PLLC today by calling (703) 865-7710 and schedule an initial consultation in our Fairfax law office.

Legal Disclaimer: Do not rely on this site for legal advice. The information provided on “Keithleylaw.com” is strictly for educational and advertising purposes and to provide you with general information. Since state laws are subject to change, please schedule an appointment with our office to further discuss your personal situation. This public information is neither intended to, nor will, create an attorney-client relationship. 

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Meeting Online Can Lead to Decreased Divorce Rates

Written by Stephanie Laufer, Esq. of KEITHLEY LAW, PLLC

Those
of us born before 1990 can still remember the days before laptops, tablets,
smartphones, and Facebook took over the world. Our lives are now dominated by
the internet, whether we use it for school, work, shopping, news, or social
networking. Today, more than one-third of American marriages get their start online. The shocking part? People who meet online and marry are more likely to have more satisfying marriages, which are less likely to end in divorce.

A new study, paid for by eHarmony, the popular online dating service, and written by the Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences found that between 2005 and 2012, 35% of
Americans who got married met online; and divorce rate among couples who met
online was 2% lower than those who met off-line.

One reason? “If
you have good impulse control, you may be more likely to meet your spouse
[deliberately] online rather than impulsively at a bar,” the researchers state.

The study
suggests that couples who meet at school or through friends have more
fulfilling relationships than those who meet at a bar or at work.

Another reason for the success of online relationships is that people are more likely
to be honest and revealing online. When people meet face-to-face, they feel
self-conscious, or feel compelled to “save face.” Online interaction reduces or
eliminates some of the nervousness and allows people to interact candidly,
comfortably.

We
see the advertisements for dating websites and tell ourselves, “I’ll never meet someone online.  I’d rather give up on love all together than
resort to finding a date online.” But “online” isn’t a four letter
word.  It just might be the means to the
end that you’ve been looking for all along. 
Your friends might tell you that you never know who the person really
is, that he/she is a liar or a scam artist. Well fear not, Virginia provides an
avenue for

annulment of a marriage
if your spouse isn’t who he or she claimed to be. You are entitled to an
annulment if:

1. Your
   spouse turns out to be incurably impotent, which was known to him at the time
   you decided to get married;
2. Your
   spouse was convicted of a felony and forgot to tell you about it before you got
   married;
3. Your
   spouse has a child with another, or fathered a child born to a woman other than
   the wife within ten months after the date of marriage;
4. Your
   spouse was a prostitute prior to marriage and again, forgot to tell you about
   it.

Are you ready for marriage, but hesitant because of lingering student loans or low
income? Read on about why marriage rates in America are at an all-time low, and
the things you should consider before tying the knot.

If you’re looking for an experienced Virginia family law attorney or divorce lawyer, contact Keithley Law, PLLC today by calling (703) 865-7710 and schedule an initial consultation in our Fairfax law office.

Legal Disclaimer: Do not rely on this site for legal advice. The information provided on “Keithleylaw.com” is strictly for educational and advertising purposes and to provide you with general information. Since state laws are subject to change, please schedule an appointment with our office to further discuss your personal situation. This public information is neither intended to, nor will, create an attorney-client relationship. 

photo credit: (http://www.flickr.com/photos/bixentro/344673250/)

Basics of Virginia Law and Prenuptial Agreements

Written by Stephanie Laufer, Esq. of KEITHLEY LAW, PLLC

Hollywood’s Portrayal of Prenuptial or Premarital Agreements 

June is here, and although the warm weather is only just beginning, wedding season is hot underway. American Idol fans celebrated this weekend as former contestants Diana DeGarmo and Ace Young tied the knot. Billionaire Napster Mogul and Facebook investor Sean Parker shelled out a cool $10 million for his Game of Thrones –themed nuptials, which also took place this past weekend.

We hear about lavish celebrity weddings all the time and wait eagerly to glance at photographs of the designer gowns and exotic locations chosen by America’s royalty. It is all too easy to get caught up in the excitement and extravagance of weddings and engagements that we forget about the “what-ifs”. What if it doesn’t work out; what if I change my mind; what will happen to me if I put my career on hold to start a family?

Prenups and Gold-Diggers?

The prenuptial agreement, or “prenup”, has been characterized through movies and television as a vicious ultimatum presented to gold-digging women by their wealthy fiancés due to pressure from the family. In reality, yes, a prenuptial agreement can be used to protect an affluent individual from his or her ambitious spouse. However, they are not just for the wealthy. In fact, prenuptial agreements are most commonly used by couples where one or both of the parties have been previously married. So what exactly is a prenuptial agreement?

Prenuptial Agreements Under Virginia Law

In Virginia, prenuptial agreements or premarital agreements must be in writing and signed by both parties, according to the Premarital Agreement Act, or Chapter 8 of Title 20 of the Virginia Code. 

The Basics of Prenuptial Agreements

A prenuptial agreement is a contract that couples sign prior to marriage which details the rights and obligations of each party in the event of death or divorce, and often contains provisions relating to the following:

1. The rights and obligations of each of the parties to property;

2. The right to buy, sell, or otherwise manage and control property;

3. The disposition of property upon separation, marital dissolution, death, or the occurrence or nonoccurrence of any other event;

4. Spousal support;

5. The making of a will, trust, or other arrangement to carry out the provisions of the agreement;

6. The disposition of a life insurance policy.

Why Have a Prenuptial Agreement?

There are many reasons to enter into a prenuptial agreement with your spouse, and the decision to do so does not mean that you believe the relationship will fail, or that you and your spouse do not trust one another. Divorces can be expensive, messy, and lengthy. Kim Kardashian was married to Kris Humphries for 72 days, and has been divorcing him for over one year. Steven Spielberg famously lost $100 million in his divorce, while the ex-wives of Paul McCartney and James Cameron walked away with $50 million respectively.

You’re not a pessimist if you decide to draft an agreement with your spouse while you two still like each other. Talk to your fiancé about a prenuptial agreement.

What Prenuptial Agreements Cannot Contain Under Virginia Law

Typically, Virginia courts will not enforce provisions of a prenuptial agreement that cover custodial rights, child support amounts and visitation. Quite simply, a court always has jurisdiction over these types of provisions, according to changed circumstances and best interests of children. 

If you’re looking for an experienced Virginia family law attorney or divorce lawyer, contact Keithley Law, PLLC today by calling (703) 865-7710 and schedule an initial consultation in our Fairfax law office.

Legal Disclaimer: Do not rely on this site for legal advice. The information provided on “Keithleylaw.com” is strictly for educational and advertising purposes and to provide you with general information. Since state laws are subject to change, please schedule an appointment with our office to further discuss your personal situation. This public information is neither intended to, nor will, create an attorney-client relationship. 

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Still a Good Time to Buy: The State of the Northern Virginia Housing Market

The Current State of the Housing Market in Northern Virginia

In Northern Virginia, we’re seeing an increase in the number of home sales with the warmer weather. You may be reading this blog because of lingering questions as to whether you should buy or rent. Real estate agents seem to be fighting over available listings with the reduction in the inventory of homes for sale. 

The Current State of the National Housing Market

Nationwide, the housing market continues to grow at a steady, sustainable pace, and Virginia is having no trouble keeping up. According to Fannie Mae’s (FNMA/OTC) Economic & Strategic Research Group, housing is expected to act as a tailwind for the economy throughout this year and into 2014, despite intermittent ups and downs in market conditions. The volume of real estate sold in Virginia in the first quarter 2013 was $5.4 billion, an 11.3% increase from the first quarter of 2012 ($4.8 billion), which is an indication that the market is finally recovering from the 2006-2011 steep decline in housing prices. So how do you decide if it is time to rent or buy?

To Rent or Buy?

Homeowners were not the only people effected by the market crash. Rather, the decline in homeownership due to unemployment and foreclosure has spilled over onto the renters’ market, with single-family households disproportionately occupying the new renter demand. As a result of the rising demand and limited supply of rentals, the housing costs have significantly increased for working-class renters. 

While working-class homeowners (who held onto their home through the crisis) saw a 3% decrease in housing costs, working-class renters suffered a 6% rise in housing costs, according to The Center for Housing Policy’s (CHP) annual “Housing Landscape”.
The long and short of it is: inventory is down (and decreasing), prices are up, and properties aren’t staying on the market for very long. If you think you are ready to buy, now is the time. There are 35% fewer homes on the market now than there were this time last year. 

Buying is a Good Option

Unemployment rates are declining, and young adults are taking advantage of the favorable mortgage rates. According to the Fairfax City Patch, in a recent blog, “MarketWatch”, the sequestration has not had an obvious impact on the housing market and sales rates are expected to continue rising. Homebuyers purchasing properties below $500,000 are going to have a difficult time finding available homes for sale if they don’t act fast. With the cost of renting a home meeting often exceeding the cost of buying a home, why wait? 

Strike while the iron is hot!

If you’re looking for an experienced Northern Virginia real estate lawyer or Northern Virginia real estate attorney, contact Keithley Law, PLLC today by calling (703) 865-7710 and schedule an initial consultation in our Fairfax law office.

Legal Disclaimer: Do not rely on this site for legal advice. The information provided on “Keithleylaw.com” is strictly for educational and advertising purposes and to provide you with general information. Since state laws are subject to change, please schedule an appointment with our office to further discuss your personal situation. This public information is neither intended to, nor will, create an attorney-client relationship. 

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Your Style of Communication is the Best Predictor of Whether Your Marriage Will End in Divorce

Divorce is Not Your Only Option

My fascination for learning as much as I can about the psychological aspects of why people divorce has shaped my professional career. On a more personal level, I have more insight as to why people divorce and how to stop a potential divorce from occurring. Some of my favorite relationship experts include Harville Hendrix, Susan Anderson, Pia Mellody and John Gottman. Based on my professional experience, I think many clients could have avoided divorce, but instead, they give up on professional marriage counseling or refuse to attend, and instead, they see me to help them navigate the legal process of separation and divorce.

Stop Your Divorce by Learning How to Communicate (Effectively)

Your style of communication is the best predictor of whether your marriage will end in divorce. Stop your divorce by learning how to communicate. In this blog, I’m covering the number one reason people divorce: communication meltdown. 

The Divorce “Whisperer”: Dr. John Gottman

My all-time favorite expert on marriage, divorce and problems with communication is John Gottman. Dr. Gottman has been the leading expert in this field for many decades. In fact, he came up with the famous “Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse” principle. According to Dr. Gottman, there are four communication “types” that better predict the chances of divorce, than any other factor. In his famous study conducted in 1992, Dr. Gottman accurately predicted the rate of divorce in couples he was studying using the Four Horsemen model 94% of the time. 

So, which communication types are more likely to lead to divorce? Put another way, to stop your divorce or to divorce-proof your marriage, make sure you don’t fit in one of these categories:

Dr. Gottman: The Four Horsemen (or bad ways to communicate)

1. Critical communicators: Do you have a tendency to attack your spouses personality, instead of narrowing in on what is making you upset? For example, if your husband forgets your anniversary, are you more likely to say, “You’re such a selfish person. I can’t believe you forgot our anniversary?” Or, would you more likely confront your spouse with the following statement: “I’m really hurt that you forgot our anniversary?” If you attack your husband’s personality or character traits, you may be more likely to divorce.

2. Communication by contempt: This style of communication is similar to that used by a critical communicator, but it’s more insidious, mostly non-verbal. Examples include communication by eye-rolling or by snickering at your spouse when you’re upset. When you communicate in this form, your spouse can feel nothing but disrespected. Can you see why? Imagine your spouse telling you that you forgetting an anniversary makes her feel ignored or unimportant. If you disagree, and you mutter, “Whatever,” that is an obvious sign of disrespect and invalidation of your spouse’s feelings.

3. Defensive communication: Personally, I think we’re all guilty of this style of communication to some degree, but I guess it’s the level of defensiveness that sets us apart from being a true defensive communicator. Do you routinely deny responsibility and blame your spouse for your behavior? If so, I suggest changing your method of communication.

4. Stonewallers: Stonewalling and ignoring go hand-in-hand. Men, according to Gottman, are more likely to stonewall, than women. Although we may all be guilty of stonewalling, it becomes a problem if you use it regularly. A person who stonewalls is someone who refuses to acknowledge someone by ignoring him/her or refusing to interact/respond. If your wife says, “I wish you would compliment me more because I wonder if you really find me attractive,” do you respond by saying, “I do find you attractive, and I will try harder to make you know this?” Or, do you respond to your wife with nothing but a blank stare? 

The good news is that you can divorce-proof your marriage if you adopt a healthy style of communication. If your method of communication can be described as stonewalling, contemptuous, defensive, or critical, then according to Dr. Gottman, you are probably headed for divorce.

If you’re looking for an experienced Virginia family law attorney or divorce lawyer, contact Keithley Law, PLLC today by calling (703) 865-7710 and schedule an initial consultation in our Fairfax law office.

Legal Disclaimer: Do not rely on this site for legal advice. The information provided on “Keithleylaw.com” is strictly for educational and advertising purposes and to provide you with general information. Since state laws are subject to change, please schedule an appointment with our office to further discuss your personal situation. This public information is neither intended to, nor will, create an attorney-client relationship. 

photo credit: (http://www.flickr.com/photos/yourdon/2573762303/)

Probate Law and Family Law Lessons to Learn from Anna Nicole Smith

The Anna Nicole Smith Legacy

Dannielynn, the daughter of late Playboy model, actress and television personality Anna Nicole Smith, could be awarded as much as $49 million in sanctions per court orders from the estate of E. Pierce Marshall, the son of Anna Nicole’s late-husband J. Howard Marshall.  

Will Challenge

For over a decade, Smith attempted to recover hundreds of millions of dollars from the estate of her deceased husband, who was 90 years old at the time he married 26 year old Smith; and died one year later without including her in his will or trust.
Smith challenged the will, claiming Marshall had promised to leave her more than $300 million in addition to cash and gifts she received during their brief marriage. A bankruptcy judge in California originally decided in her favor, awarding her $475 million from Marshall’s estate, with a federal judge reducing that amount to $89 million in 2002. Now, a California federal judge has ordered Marshall’s estate to “pay sanctions over ‘massive discovery abuse’ in the legal battle against his stepmother, Smith, which will ultimately fall into the hands of Smith’s heir, Dannielynn. 

Virginia Marital Property and Virginia Probate Law

Under Virginia probate law, a spouse is legally entitled to inherit the estate of his or her partner immediately upon marriage, with certain exceptions, such as prenuptial agreements and property settlement agreements or PSAs, wherein couples establish their legal rights and obligations.
When any person having title to any real estate dies intestate, the real estate passes to the surviving spouse of the intestate. If the intestate is survived by children or grandchildren of a previous relationship who are not related by blood to the surviving spouse, two-thirds of the estate pass to all the intestate’s children and grandchildren, and the spouse gets the last third. However, if the property was originally an inheritance from the deceased’s family, then it passes directly to the children and grandchildren. Sound confusing? 

What You Can Do Now to Avoid Will Contests Later

Here is how you can prevent leaving a mess for your loved ones: 

1. Draft a will or trust that outlines who will inherit legal title to your real estate and personal property; 

2. Sell your house…to yourself and those whom you wish to inherit it. A deed of gift or gift deed is a popular tool for transferring legal ownership and rights to specific property between relatives (though not exclusively). If you want your children to inherit your property after you pass without worrying about wills, testacy and family battles, deed the property to you and your children as joint tenants with the right of survivorship.
The right of survivorship means that when two or more people own property, upon the death of one of the owners, the property remains in the hands of the surviving owners or successors who assert the right of survivorship. The right of survivorship takes precedence over other claims to the property. It is the royal flush of ownership claims, and is the best way to ensure that your property is going to the right people.

If you’re looking for an experienced Virginia family law attorney or divorce lawyer, contact Keithley Law, PLLC today by calling (703) 865-7710 and schedule an initial consultation in our Fairfax law office.

Legal Disclaimer: Do not rely on this site for legal advice. The information provided on “Keithleylaw.com” is strictly for educational and advertising purposes and to provide you with general information. Since state laws are subject to change, please schedule an appointment with our office to further discuss your personal situation. This public information is neither intended to, nor will, create an attorney-client relationship. 

photo credit: (http://www.flickr.com/photos/ken_mayer/5599532152/lightbox/)

Divorcing a Narcissist

Should I Divorce My Narcissistic Spouse?

Whether or not to divorce is a personal decision that should only be reached after careful consideration. Sometimes, divorce is the only viable option to escape a toxic relationship. If you’re married to a narcissist, you’re probably in a toxic relationship and without treatment, a narcissist will never be able to meet your needs, since he/she is too preoccupied with meeting his/own needs. Quite often, a narcissist will deny having any personality problems, and the narcissist-spouse may even blame you, become overly angry or rage at any suggestions of such. In many cases, divorce may be necessary. 

Famous Narcissists and Greek Mythology

Narcissus was a mythological Greek character who fell in love with his own image. After discovering his own image was not really another person, this Greek myth tells us that he dies from deep sorrow and grief because his image did not belong to another person. He fell in love with himself. In the late-60’s, a psychiatrist coined the term “narcissism” to describe someone with a clinical personality disorder where delusions of grandeur were prevalent. Famous people with narcissism include OJ Simpson, Paris Hilton and Alec Baldwin. Historical, narcissistic figures includes Nero, Hitler and Machiavelli. 

Divorce and Personality Disorders

Personality disorders seem to be responsible for many divorces. It’s not unusual for a divorce attorney to hear a client filing for divorce to accuse his/her spouse of some type of personality or mental health disorder. Only a small percentage of people suffer from actual personality disorders, and I truly believe most people can exhibit personality traits commonly recognized in personality disorders without actually suffering from personality disorders or receiving a clinical diagnosis. In my professional experience, the most common personality disorder complained of by divorcing spouses is narcissism or narcissistic personality disorder. 

According to the DSM-IV, narcissism is a “Cluster B” personality disorder. Other types of “Cluster B” personality disorders are those suffering from antisocial behaviors, borderline personality disorders, and those with histrionic tendencies (extreme exaggeration and overreaction to common events). Narcissists behave differently than others. Common characteristics and symptoms of narcissists, as reported by the National Institutes of Health (NIH), include having an obsession with self, exaggeration of talents, self-important feelings, expectations that others should treat them with respect and favoritism, disregarding others’ feelings, lack of empathy, preoccupation with power and success, and overreacting or reacting poorly to criticism.

Married to a Narcissist

Do you believe you’re married to a narcissist who will never seek professional help for the serious underlying personality disorder? Make sure you put your own safety and your children’s safety first. Get professional help for yourselves and involve law enforcement, if necessary. If divorce is imminent or necessary, make sure you speak with an experienced divorce attorney or divorce lawyer. 

If you’re looking for an experienced Virginia family law attorney or divorce lawyer, contact Keithley Law, PLLC today by calling (703) 865-7710 and schedule an initial consultation in our Fairfax law office.

Legal Disclaimer: Do not rely on this site for legal advice. The information provided on “Keithleylaw.com” is strictly for educational and advertising purposes and to provide you with general information. Since state laws are subject to change, please schedule an appointment with our office to further discuss your personal situation. This public information is neither intended to, nor will, create an attorney-client relationship. 

photo credit: (http://www.flickr.com/photos/hills_alive/6174305913/)